King Of Anything by Sara Bareilles <3


Keep drinkin' coffee
Stare me down across the table
While I look outside

So many things I'd say if only I were able
But I just keep quiet
And count the cars that pass by

You've got opinions, man
We're all entitled to 'em
But I never asked

So let me thank you for your time
And try to not waste any more of mine
Get out of here fast

I hate to break it to you, babe
But I'm not drowning
There's no one here to save

Who cares if you disagree?
You are not me
Who made you king of anything?
So you dare tell me who to be
Who died and made you king of anything?
.....

AWWW this upper lines my favourite!!!

Oh (oh oh oh)
Oh (oh oh oh)
Oh (oh oh oh)
Oh (oh oh oh)

You sound so innocent
All full of good intent
You swear you know best

But you expect me to
Jump up on board with you
And ride off into your delusional sunset

I'm not the one who's lost
With no direction oh
But you'll never see

You're so busy makin' maps
With my name on them in all caps
You've got the talkin' down
Just not the listening

And who cares if you disagree?
You are not me
Who made you king of anything?
So you dare tell me who to be
Who died and made you king of anything?

All my life
I've tried
To make everybody happy while I
Just hurt
And hide
Waitin' for someone to tell me it's my turn
To decide.

Oh (oh oh oh)
Oh (oh oh oh)
Oh (oh oh oh)
Oh (oh oh oh)

Who cares if you disagree?
You are not me.
Who made you king of anything?
So you dare tell me who to be.
Who died and made you king of anything?

Who cares if you disagree?
You are not me.
Who made you king of anything?
So you dare tell me who to be.
Who died and made you king of anything?

Let me hold your crown, babe.
Oh ohhhhhhhhhhh

Ahhhhhhhhhhh

I JUST WANNA RUN AWAY HAVE A RELEASE

Malam ni study EIA ditemani dengan perasaan yang tak certain daripada semalam lagi..

tak tahulah kenapa distraction ni terlalu kuat.. mungkin saja syaitan telah melakukan kerjanya

dan telah berjaya sikit-sikit menggoyahkan keyakinan aku yang tak pernah nak yakin ni.

Well... apart of all, now im thinking of running away from all of these problem?

why should I have to struggle alone to make sure that everything is okay?

and nobody cares at all, they just know how to ask, yell, shout and order like I am the idiot one.

I am tired of this, please.. I am not as dumb as all of you thought it was, I have a strong concrete head that will never break with your accusation. and I have a tiger inner voice that always whispering not to be bullied again!

What if running away? I would love to run now... my head is heavy and i'm sinking in the situation where I have to pretend to be strong, in fact, I don't have courage at all.. dpoing this alone, oh the feel is just shit!

Rasanya mungkin semua orang akan puas hati dan berhenti buat semua ni kalau aku mati.

atau aku pergi ke tempat lain dan hilang dari semua orang... honestly, aku dah start rasa bosan dan meluat dan menyampah dan penat dengan semua ni..

aku buat semua ni macam terpaksa atas sebab ape pun aku tak pasti, dan aku lakukannya out of courage. aku penat lah paksa perasaan aku... inilah perasaan yang sama aku rasa masa mak sakit.. akhirnya ia berakhir dengan tragis sekali.

Aku bukan nak mulakan perasaan putus asa aku tu, atau sikap rebellious aku yang aku sendiri tau memang outrageous sangat. Tolong jangan paksa aku buat sekali dan sekali lagi... aku tak sanggup tengok kemusnahan yang berlaku akibat tu.

Tapi manusia2 sekeliling kita ni memang jahat dan mereka ni mementing kan diri. mereka bukanlah orang yang sayangkan kita, tetapi mereka hanyalah orang yang ambil manfaat daripada kita dan tak pernah pedulikan ape perasaan dan keadaan kita sebenarnya. 

" when you lose the one you wanted Cause you taking her for granted, and everything you had got destroyed" 

Dont make me take this wrong turn, even I know it was wrong but it seems like everyone is asking me to do so. My life was never perfect, it is not hard for me to taste it all over again.. to face the pain, cruel and heartless world,  one more time, I think I will be more endure this time. I am not asking for it but incase I have to go thru it again, I think I am okay, and I dont care anymore. I dont have anybody to be concerned for, I live with myself, just myself alone. I dont have to care about anything. 

Everybody has got their own living, their own home and shelter, their own companion and friend and I am needed by no one. I am just hate being fooled by all people around me. They pretend like they love me but they actually not. 

Abah dan Surah Hafazan

This is a throwback

Semalam masa sakit, aku baca buku TG Harun Din tu
dan terbacalah segala tafsiran ayat-ayat yang selalu baca

Dulu masa darjah 6.. Not sure bout the time
aku masuk hafazan
untuk pertandingan
baca Alfatihah dan terjemahannya

Dari kecik lagi aku memang minat hafal Quran
Alhamdulillah benda tu berpanjangan sampai tingkatan
Dan Innalillah.. sekarang ni tak lagi. Allah..

Ingat lagi ketika tu
Abah ajar aku satu-satu
Dan pada waktu tu
Gigih aku bertalaqqi dengan abah

Dan aku susah gila nak hafal semua
Punyelah abah susah nak suh aku hafal
Dan abah ajar aku doa penerang hati

Yang pada waktu tu ak sorang je tau
antara schoolmate waktu tu
Yang pelik nya, apa yang abah sampaikan tu
Aku ingat sampai sekarang

Seriously, aku hafal terjemahan Al-fatihah tu masa dengan abah tu
Tapi waktu tu otak langsung tak digest
Tapi kenapa sekarang aku ingat pulak.
Pelik kan..

Masa tu abah duduk je kat tempat abah
sebab abah dah start sakit
again, Im not sure what year it was

Bagusla abah sebenarnya
tak sempat nak tuntut ilmu dengan abah
sebab aku asyik main je childhood aku
pastu tengok cerita2 Jepun dengan fanatik gila.
Memangla kann..